However, as much as we might like to think otherwise, every single one of us has weaknesses, too. And these weaknesses guide our lives as much as our strengths do. It’s easy to think of weaknesses as bad things, or obstacles we have to contend with, but really, like our strengths, they’re all just part of who we are as a whole person.
It may be tempting to deny a weakness, ignore it, or hide it away like it doesn’t exist, but those methods don’t serve us. Instead, we can accept our weaknesses – and our strengths – without judgment as integral parts of who we are.
Taking time to find, identify, and even sit with your weaknesses allows you to get a better understanding of yourself, and where you are on your life journey at your current moment. A weakness, although it may seem like it, doesn’t have to be a fault or a bad thing. If we didn’t have any weaknesses, we wouldn’t be able to identify or appreciate our strengths. We wouldn’t have anything to work on or ways to improve ourselves if we were already amazing at everything.
Finding your weaknesses helps you to identify areas you could benefit from working on, and even assist you in setting new and important goals for yourself. Addressing your weaknesses, rather than sweeping them aside can help you to build character, gain new skills, and develop and mature as an individual.
Rather than viewing your weaknesses as low points that need to be avoided or skated around, instead try looking at them as valuable learning opportunities. Every time you identify a weakness or an area of your life you’d like to work on, you’re giving yourself the freedom to change and improve, and the gift of focusing on parts of your life that matter to you. Each instance like this gives you an opportunity to work on turning weakness into strength.
If unaddressed, weaknesses can linger, becoming true phobias, deficits, or problems in your life. If one of your weaknesses is that you’re a little shy in social situations, for example, continuing to give into this weakness may cause you to avoid social events altogether, further compounding your social anxiety and making it more and more difficult for you to thrive in social environments. On the other hand, if you put together a plan to work on your social apprehension one small step at a time – saying hi to one stranger, stopping into a work event you’d normally skip, etc. – you will start to make progress toward overcoming this weakness.
Before you can do anything about your weaknesses, you have to know what they are. This can seem straightforward, but many of us are so afraid of our own weaknesses that we repress them, sometimes for years at a time, until they’re locked down so deep inside of us that we don’t even realize they’re there, eating away at our self-confidence and autonomy.
Allow yourself to sit down and meditate or think on your own strengths and weaknesses. Sometimes, quiet reflection can help bring these to light. Alternatively, consider writing out a list of personal strengths and weaknesses, so you can see them all in writing. If you’re still feeling stuck, reach out to people you trust and ask them to name some things they consider to be your strengths and weaknesses.
Once you’ve identified your weaknesses, figure out which ones are important to you and your life, and which are more minor. One tried and true way to do this is to let your beliefs and values guide you.
If you have a weakness that makes it difficult for you to live by your core values, for example, this may be an area worth working on. If you have a weakness, on the other hand, that doesn’t really impact your life, and doesn’t feel particularly pressing or important to you, it may not be something you need to work on right away.
Once you have that list of all of your strengths and weaknesses and values and beliefs laid out in front of you, it can seem very overwhelming. You may feel as though you need to address every single area of concern immediately and at the same time.
Pause and take a deep breath. This is not the case at all.
Working on our weaknesses, just like nurturing our strengths, isn’t a one-and-done type of chore. This is a lifelong process, and you don’t need to rush it. Our strengths and weaknesses will evolve with us through our lives, and different things will matter more or less to you at different times.
Start small. Pick one area of weakness that you feel is currently impacting your life in a negative way and make a plan to work on it. Take it in baby steps, or tiny bites. You don’t have to remedy the entire situation today. Simply taking one small step forward can make a world of difference over time. Stay focused and keep moving ahead.
Having a plan of action makes even the most overwhelming tasks and changes feel manageable. Create a plan of actionable, measurable, observable steps that will get you closer to your goal of improving one of your weaknesses. Keep the end goal at the back of your mind, but keep your eyes fixed on the smaller steps that will get you there over time.
When you start to work on your weaknesses, it’s only natural at times to fixate on the negatives. If there’s so much that needs fixing, are you doing anything right at all? Yes, you are. Whenever you begin to doubt this, refer to your list of strengths. You’re great at many things. Don’t forget that.
Cultivating a positive mindset will not only make you feel better about yourself, but it will also attract more positive feelings, events, and circumstances to you and your life. Like attracts like, so the more positivity you put out there, the more you’re likely to receive in return.
Most importantly, always remember: you don’t have to embark on this journey alone. This is one reason many people turn to life coaching. A qualified life coach can help build your self-esteem and self-confidence, and get you on track toward creating the life you’ve always imagined.
Jonette Dyer is here to help you cultivate a supportive environment for change, through her personal coaching services. With decades of experience in leadership coaching, career coaching, and life coaching, Jonette Dyer can help you start living out your core values, and turning your weaknesses into strengths.
She will work with you to identify and set meaningful and attainable
goals, and help you become the best and most authentic version of yourself. Contact Jonette today to
start your journey.
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